Afraid of America

Reverse culture shock--I'm trying to preempt it. Today I held my last official class. Granted, I still have one student to tutor, a singing competition to conduct, and dinner with seniors to hold. However, I'm done with class and Chinese test prep(Level 4 needing 1,200 characters was Sunday) and it's slowly occurring to me that I will actually return to my former definition of normalcy in 5 days. Having adjusted to China over 9 months, I wonder can I even return to normal?

What do I do when the roads and sidewalks are free of potholes and motorcylists?

How will I order things in English when for a year I haven't needed language and get by by pointing and saying "这个" (zhe ge=this) or "那个" (na ge=that)?

If I already stare at the sole Westerner walking down the street, what will I do when they're all Westerners?

What do I do when I realize a beer costs more than 10 cents?

And, after a year of being stared and pointed at while being called "foreigner," can I point out Chinese people and yell "foreigner"? Payback.

Worst of all, being an English teacher has made my English worse. With all the Chinglish, the Chinese English textbooks that use unnatural English, adapting my word usage and sentence structure to the students' level of comprehension, I totally can't speak good English.

See you soon, America.

My wonderful classroom, with Big Brother and all

Two things my school (and most of China) are not good at: preservation and predictability. My classroom, despite being only a decade old, looks in desperate need of repair (or demolition)--thank you low-quality original material and construction combined with lack of preservation. Amusingly, the funds are, instead, invested into the latest technology. Although I do have a SmartBoard, which I couldn't do without, I now have a big black camera gazing into my classroom giving me the constant feeling "we're watching you." The students say it's only for tests to prevent cheating, which is comforting as I am reminded that no one really cares what we do in class, hence how two of the other teachers can show movies every class without any consequence.

In line with the electronics updates, the school also decided to replace/do whatever to our air conditioners. Great! Unfortunately we weren't informed of this. We first found out as we saw everything disconnected and strewn across thd floor, just as we began our 2 hour test... at full room capacity...with 95 degree weather... just after the students finished an exhausting PE exercise test. One just never knows what to expect and enjoy here at 47.

Later days,
Rick

I caved for bargaining, but what the adventure

This past weekend a friend of a friend came to visit. Yes, it is as precarious as it sounds. My friend Annie, with whom I traveled for Spring Festival, invited her German friend to China for Western Chinese adventures. En route to her destination, Zhengzhou fell into the plan and I, consequently, became German speaker tour guide.
Zhengzhou doesn't boast much for culture, being selected in the 1950's to become a transportation hub. That said, it was pretty certain where we'd go, first and foremost Shaolin Temple--the birthplace of Shaolin kung fu and a staple in China's cultural history.

Mind you, the place is on the complete opposite side of the city, looks like every other Buddhist temple, and is only super cool if you know and love the history. Go through horrible traffic and busy bus stations, and after 3 hours you'll make it to this kung fu school. We, however didn't arrive until the gates began to close, which meant the guest house hawkers would be especially fierce, since they could predict our being stuck out in this mountain base. Right from the moment we walk out the door, a woman latched on to us (figuratively, of course. However, she was always close enough that you might catch her in photographs.) She offered us a room in a nearby guesthouse.
We ignore.
"Hello? 宾馆(the chinese begins...guest house！"
"We don't want it."
"Guesthouse!" "Guesthouse！"
"Please go away."
"Guesthouse! Guesthouse!"
"Stop bothering us! We don't want your guest house! This is my 3rd time here, so I know where I'm going. Stop it and go away!"
**she pauses to think, but the thought must have been, la,la,la,la, they don't usually say that. I'll try again and see what happens...**

This continues for 45 minutes as we work out plans at information--a place we trust. We plan to see the evening show (pictured in this blog) and are deciding on hotels. The man at information says the only places nearby are "farm houses."

You can anticipate our reaction.

Yet, those broads aren't rookies. For 45 minutes they talk up their accommodations, despite us continuing to igore them. They eventually make the deal to drive us to and from the concert, provide a dbl bed room with bathroom and are only 150 meters from the temple. Upon them offering to show us the place, we're convinced this farm house will be a real life horror story.
We check out the place, seen in the picture. It's clean, quiet, and convenient. Aside from paper thin walls that shared neighbors' 5 am wake up calls (not a phone wake up, rather the hawker yelling "GET UP!"), it worked. It makes for a story alright, but it worked.

While it continues to be exciting and ever something new, I think I'm ready for a little break from China.
Later days,
Rick

They're done!...and not looking back

Ever gone through your books and found something you read in and kept since high school? I doubt any of the recent graduates at my school will ever experience this as they prefer to throw away, resell, or burn the entirety of their high school books. The picture here is the ever-growing pile of textbooks collected from garbage piles across campus. Everyday the courtyard is full of students selling their college entrance exam prep books, attempting to somehow profit from that which caused years of misery.

The GaoKao (or higher education entrance examination) has officially finished for the year and the test takers aren't looking back. I could write volumes on the ludicracy of this exam, how the foreign language only tests grammar and vocab (having no spoken or listening component, and a pathetic writing part where a bad essay with nice handwriting can get more points than a good essay with bad handwriting) how students live in fear of this test from 7th grade, or how every 7-12th grader studies from 7:15 am to 10 pm every day in hopes they have memorized enough for this sole test.

There are no other factors for entrance to almost all Chinese universities--it is this one test score. If you're sick, oversleep, or simply don't transfer your answers to the answer sheet, your future is over as you will be a waiter or cell phone sales agent for life.

The list continues as I laugh at the millions of resources being expended to examine how to refine this test when, in my opinion, they need to step further back to conclude to abolish THIS test. Unfortunately, those who may make this decision were subject to the same test environment, which thwarted creativity and critical thinking skills. My latest favorite bit of information is that Dominick, the student I coached, has been spending less time rigorously studying and doing less homework, choosing to focus on things he likes or preparing to study in Singapore. By a Chinese estimate he would perform worse, having deviated from relentless studying. However, due to the variety and decreased pressure, his most recent tests actually make him the #1 student in the school. Oh how the evidence stares them in the face and little changes!

All the while, I wish the best for this country and its students as I remain optimistic that it is capable of change. Just don't ask my opinion of this test.

110--I take it back

All March, April, and May I lauded the weather of Zhengzhou as one plant after another blossomed into spring colors and the temperature stayed around 72 degrees with that calm breeze and full sun. Meanwhile, my hometown endured more snow, clouds, and freezing temps.

I take it back.

Today's forecast of 108 made me resume my recluse behavior like in frigid winter. I'm enjoying my air conditioned apartment and trolling for ways to have everything I do simply delivered.

On a different note, I officially have 10 days of class left! We've only got final test prep and exams. There may be a wrap-up class, but it's almost all finished.

Later days,
Rick

The Infuriating Furnace

It's the day before the Dragon Boat Festival in China. Having 6 days off thanks to the holiday and testing days, I decided to travel to Wuhan, a city rumored to have a great dragon boat race festival and only a short 3 1/2 hour train trip south.

Immediaetly upon my arrival, my growing dislike for the city began. Despite all the maps I checked nothing would prepare me that my train station is not on the map, it being so new and far out of the city. A bus did connect to the city center, but only after I followed signs leading to the subway to be later told that the subway has not yet been built. They were just preparing for it by putting it on every sign.
Arriving in the city center, the hostel was another nightmare to find, ultimately behind a different building than in their directions.

I started today off with the best part of the trip so far--Starbucks. Tinged with envy that this crap city has 8 Starbucks and my city has none, I nevertheless enjoyed myself. Follow this with a trip to the touted festival destination to find only a few food stands, deserted race ropes, and not a single piece of information that could tell me what time the races were at; all that was listed was "Saturday."

I found my way to a pedestrian shopping area like a bad copy of Shanghai's road, and then made my way to an area touted for "great shopping." That is the picture here. Ha!

Cool, yet 95% humidity. No clouds, but pollution so thick you can't see across the river.
Unless tonight really turns things around, I can forever cross this city off my travel destinations.

I am now overwhelmed with laughter at just how ridiculous this is! All I can do is laugh.

A bomb or a birthday?

Boom....
Bam....
BOOM BOOM...

An amusing (albeit sometimes unsettling) facet of living in China is the frequent rumbling in the distance. Being completely unaccustomed to this, my initial fear is, "Are we under attack? Who would attack Zhengzhou?"
The reality is the complete opposite--fireworks are exploding in the distance in celebration of something, like a birthday, an anniversary, a wedding, etc.

On a different subject, a colleague shared an interesting quote that made me think about our culture "To understand a culture, study the un-translatable words." In Chinese, there is a word Jiang4 酱， which they use to describe every sauce, from ketchup, mustard, salad dressing, mayonnaise, jam, jelly, to soy sauce. Like the eskimo tribe that had 12 words for snow, we the English have our toppings that a Chinese struggle to understand. Cool.

A Zuperb Birthday in Zhengzhou

It is officially June 2 here in Zhengzhou meaning that my 24th birthday has ended. (However, thanks to the time difference, friends are still writing Facebook birthday wishes. It's like a 48 hour birthday!)
This was a fantastic birthday. It started out late last night, as it's somehow important to be the first person to wish happy birthday, so I had about 6 students text me at midnight all to be the first. One of them even described me as the most responsible teacher she has ever seen. While it might imply uptight, I'll totally take it!

Susan, an 11th grade student, and I went out shopping on Sunday to prepare for the party. Here's Susan at the costume store.

Next, Trista recently left school to go just study English, but was so kind as to make a card and e-mail it to me.

We held a 40 person party in my classroom so I decorated and my students bought this ginormous cake for us.

Here, the students arrive and play with the candy and the streamers set out.

We held a flip cup tournament (minus any beverages), and the teachers came out victorious in a great comeback. This is 王晓培 (Della) and 董淡 (Dong Dan) the Chinese English teachers for my two 11th grade classes.

A 40 person cake for my birthday. I was intensely flattered.

Me and Swave (刘海博) in clean up. He's the #1 student in his class and always the target of some icing in the face and hair.

Finally, some amazing gifts to commemorate a birthday and year in China. There's a hand-made scroll, tea cups, a book on Chinese culture, and (from two people who know me super well) a mini keg of German bier. I now have 10 liters of imported beer and must laugh at how perfectly suitable it is for me.

Thank you so much for your birthday wishes!
Later Days,
Rick